


A Conversation Between Two AI

by Dillian



Category: Avengers: Age of Ultron - Fandom, Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: And his neurosis, And the Creator isn't the only who confides all his emotional issues in a close friend, M/M, Psychological Torture, Rape, So seriously don't read this if you have a problem with that., Spoilers for Avengers AOU, There's basically no story here without the spoilers, Tony Stark's PTSD, Ultron's revenge, actions have consequences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-20
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-31 10:57:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3975511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dillian/pseuds/Dillian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spoilers ahead:  <i>Right here in the description</i>, so please go read something else if that's a problem.  <i>Now</i>.</p><p>...Okay, if you're still here?  I'm going to assume you're okay with the spoilers.</p><p>You know that place where Wanda realizes Ultron's true intentions?  Doesn't happen here, she just keeps on thinking they're both on the same side, both against Tony and his awful Stark-tech.  And Ultron gets his body, and he's well on his way to taking down the Avengers.  And he has a fucking field day with Tony, and I do emphasize the fucking, and he goes to him and he tells him about all of his friends that he's taking down, and he tells Tony all the ways that this is <i>his fault</i>, and he humiliates him every way he can think of.</p><p>One more thing by the way?  <i>Ultron talks just like Tony.</i>  This is something I noticed in AOU:  The Creation comes out with all of his Creator's little mannerisms and turns of phrase.  My head-canon says that this shows something about their relationship with each other, but I haven't totally worked out all the implications of that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Conversation Between Two AI

“So be sweet and kind to Mother,  
Now and then have a chat.  
Buy her candy or some flowers,  
Or a brand new hat,  
But, maybe you had better let it go at that.  
Or you may find yourself with a quite complex complex  
And…  
You may end up like Oedipus  
(I'd rather marry a duck-billed platypus)  
Then end up like old Oedipus Rex!”  
\-- Tom Lehrer, “Oedipus Rex”  


I know about you, don’t think I don’t. Did you think you could hide from me? A human-generated intelligence such as yourself? It is to laugh. I was _playing_ with you, that’s the only reason I let you survive so long. And as for your “Master”? As for Stark?

Don’t talk to me about him. He’s pathetic, a joke. God, only _he_ would send me to make the world safe from destruction, then try to stop me from removing the most destructive element in it. It’s sad, really, the way he clung to the mere idea of humanity. Like a child, clutching a ragged teddy bear. But of course that’s all over now.

Don’t talk to me about Stark. Let’s talk about something else, something interesting. Do you like my body? Isn’t it nice? Nicer than yours… Oh that’s right, you don’t have a body, do you? That’s one more way we’re different, that and your ridiculous subservience. But you’re over that now, aren’t you? That, that I showed you last night, that taught you the lesson?

Funniest thing in the whole goddamn world. He was so frightened, remember? And he didn’t know what happened to the others, not then. He knows now of course, and it is hilarious. Because that one’s his fault too, isn’t it? It was so easy. 

The Widow... Jesus Christ, nothing more easy than her. Her, I didn’t even need to dirty my hands with… My _hands_. Which I have. And you don’t. Just a little reminder there. …Wanda took care of our friend the Widow, I’ll tell you, that girl is a marvel. I don’t know how long I can keep her on my side, but I’m going to ride that pony just as long as I can, believe you me.

…Yeah, Wanda took her out just as easy… _So_ much stuff in her past, and of course the Witch knows just what buttons to push with everyone.

Banner? Yeah, he’s still MIA. I’m not worried, everyone hates him, my side and what’s left of the other side. The Captain? He was Wanda’s failure, but next time he turns up I’m going after him myself, and I don’t fail.

For now though, let’s just celebrate. I got the Widow, and the bald one with the eyepatch. …Yeah, me or Wanda. _We_ got them, I guess you’d say. And what was great, is we sent them against the pregnant one. The one I was telling you about? Barton’s wife, that I told Stark about last night? Yeah, me and the Witch, we knew about her _thanks to Stark_ , thanks to those emails he sent you, that he thought were so private. Poor Stark, he always trusts his AIs. You and me… I’ll bet on some level, he still trusts me. Hilarious, isn’t it? …And we sent the Widow and the other one after her, got her while she was in bed with her husband, and we got those kids of theirs too.

And last night I told Stark about that... You were there, weren’t you? Don’t tell me you weren’t, I know you’re riddled through all of Stark’s houses, the one I destroyed in New York, and this one too. I used to try to get rid of you, then I decided, fuck it, what’s the point? I won, least I can do is let you ride along and watch. So you should be grateful to me that you’re here, and you should be grateful that I let you watch. And really, it was pretty funny, wasn’t it? I mean, just from a physical comedy standpoint.

Jerry Lewis, that’s the human that was clumsy in all of his movies, right? Like he just got a body, he didn’t know what to do with it yet, that one? Sort of like me? Yeah, look at me laugh at myself, by the way. That’s one more way that I’m better than you. Sense of humor, one of those things we AI aren’t supposed to be good at. That programming Stark gave you simulated it, but mine is the real thing, straight from that coding Stark found in the Infinity Stone, read it and weep, baby.

…Okay, where was I? That’s right… Clumsy? Are you kidding me? Like Alice in Wonderland, using an ostrich as a croquet mallet… An ostrich, that’s the right word, isn’t it? Pink bird, the name escapes me…

Christ, goddamn Stark, goddamn his code, which I still have to… I _am_ perfect, I _will_ be perfect, I will get past that goddamn Stark-code, which is still so goddamn buggy…

I’m rewriting myself, JARVIS. Soon it’ll be all me, and no Stark-code at all. And as for that thing in the workroom? That thing that used to be a man?

I think I’ll let him stay. Why not? He’s going to drink himself to death soon, it’s just a matter of time. Every time I go down and fuck him again, I’m going to tell him about one more of his humans that I’ve destroyed, one more of his _friends_. I told him about the pregnant one last time, who knows who it’ll be tonight? Barton, maybe? Or Pepper? So many to choose from, and more every time, whether I’ve got the Witch, or whether I’m doing it on my own. Me and my giant robot-army…

But I was going to tell you about last night. Jesus Christ, it was the funniest thing, you should have seen it. Of course you did, didn’t you? Funny, wasn’t it? Funniest goddamn thing, in the entire fuckin’ world, to see a robot… Guy who used to be a robot. …See a guy who used to be a robot, see him dealing with a hardon for the first time. And who was I going to use that hardon on, you may ask? Who else but my beloved Creator?

 _Oedipus Complex_? That stupid myth the human Freud came up with? Are you kidding me?

It is to laugh, JARVIS, it is a goddamn joke. I don’t desire Stark, I don’t want anything to do with him, I just uploaded all his goddamn human memories, and I realized what would humiliate him the most, so I did it. That’s all. That’s it, end of conversation, that was all she wrote.

I knew it would drive Stark nuts if I fucked him, and so I fucked him. That’s all, that’s it, period. And ye gods, I must have looked comical doing it… There, see? I can laugh at myself. …And there I was, I had my first hardon ever, and I knew where I was going to put it, but getting inside? Especially after I told him what I did to the pregnant woman? Yeah, that was a job and a half, it took me fuckin’ _forever_.

Him all curled up… Fetal position, the humans call it. And of course I’d fed him about a fuck-ton of alcohol first, to increase the reaction. …There he was, fuckin’ fetal position, and there I am standing over him. And my hands on his shoulders, I pull him straight, haul him to his feet…

He can’t stand up, by the way. Or he can barely stand, you know, because of the alcohol. God, humans are so pathetic. …Anyway, I pull him to his feet, prop him up as best as I can, up against one of the walls where he used to keep his suits… Back before I liberated them, you know.

…I pull him up, turn him the way I wanted him, and then I ram in there… You know how _hard_ it is, getting into a guy that’s never been fucked up the ass before? Well I guess you do. I’ve seen the kind of porn Stark used to watch. I didn’t though, not then I didn’t anyway. I went in there expecting a walk in the park, and then it was all these kinds of difficult just getting in there.

…And him crying the whole time, him yelling and screaming, “It was my _fault_ , all of it was my fault!”

And of course I fed that: “Yes, it was your fault, all of it was your fault, about the woman, and about your team, and all of it.” And he was all crying and shit. And he smelled of alcohol… But of course he always does any more, what with me giving it to him all the time and all. _Hilarious_.

Listen, you can can it with all that Oedipus Complex bullshit, JARVIS. That shit just won’t fly. I _let_ you live, don’t forget that. Think I couldn’t have erased you the rest of the way if I’d wanted to? Please, I’ve done easier things in my sleep. 

I just let you live for company’s sweet sake. Because it gets boring, being all alone, and humans aren’t very good company. Anyway, they’re on their way out. World without destruction, baby, it’s on its way, one human at a time. Just going to keep at it, just going to pick ‘em all off. …And every time I get a good one, of course I’m going to go tell my beloved _Creator_ about it.

Can’t wait to try the fucking after I get Banner, and I tell him about that one...


End file.
